I Used to Think Emotional Content Was Manipulative.

Here's What I Got Wrong.

I Used to Think Emotional Content Was Manipulative. Here's What I Got Wrong.

For years, I avoided emotion in my marketing.

I thought it was manipulative. Cheap. The kind of thing that sleazy marketers use to trick people into buying shit they don't need.

I was a strength coach. I believed in hard work, discipline, and results. My content was all logic and systems. "Here's the plan. Here's the process. Let's fucking work."

And honestly? It worked fine. But it didn't work great.

Then I started mentoring coaches who were having the same internal battle I'd had. One coach in particular was crushing it with his content when he leaned into emotion, but he felt gross about it. He wanted to pivot back to purely motivational, "let's work hard" messaging.

Here's what I told him (and what I wish someone had told me when I started): You're not choosing between emotion and integrity. You're choosing between connection and invisibility.

The Post That Changed Everything

This coach had written a post about the struggle of leaving work stress at the gym instead of bringing it home to your family. It was raw. It was vulnerable. It tapped into the frustration every parent-coach feels.

That post blew up. DMs flooded in. People shared it with their spouses. It created a real connection.

But he felt like he was manipulating people. Like he was using their pain to sell them something.

I've known thousands of coaches over my 18 years, and I see this resistance constantly. We've been conditioned to believe that emotion equals manipulation. That if you're not purely logical and tactical, you're somehow being dishonest.

That's bullshit.

There is a science to it!

I’ve had the pleasure of learning from a lot of very notable marketers and I’ve learned that there are only three ways your content breaks through:

1. Emotion. You make someone feel something. Frustration. Hope. Recognition. Relief.

2. Novelty. You show them something they've never seen before. A new framework. A different perspective. A contrarian take. A new exercise.

3. Resonance. You articulate something they've been thinking but couldn't put into words.

The best content hits all three. That "don't bring it home" post? It evoked emotion (frustration with work-life balance), offered novelty (a specific strategy), and created resonance (a shared struggle).

Logic alone doesn't do that. Systems alone don't do that. You need emotion to create the connection that makes people actually give a shit about your logic and systems.

People don’t remember facts. They remember how you make them feel.

The Real Question Isn't "Is This Manipulative?"

You’re not using emotion to exploit.

If you're manufacturing fake problems to sell solutions, that's manipulation. If you're exaggerating pain points to create urgency, that's manipulation. If you're using emotion to get people to buy things that won't actually help them, that's manipulation.

But if you're naming a real struggle your audience is facing, telling your unique story, sharing how you've navigated it, and offering a legitimate path forward? That's not manipulation.

That's connection.

That's leadership!

Here's the difference: Manipulation uses emotion to bypass critical thinking. Connection uses emotion to create buy-in so the logic can actually land.

Your audience isn't stupid. They know when you're being authentic and when you're being performative. The coaches who worry most about being manipulative are usually the ones least likely to actually manipulate anyone.

Here is how I do it:

Start with your own experience. Don't manufacture emotion. Share what you've actually felt and learned. The specificity makes it authentic. Spend some time going through your life story and pull on the threads that were most meaningful to you… I can guarantee they’ll be the most meaningful to your audience as well.

Pair emotion with systems. Don't just make them feel something. Give them a framework to do something about it. Connect the emotion to an action.

Ask better questions. Don't tell them what to feel. Help them understand what they're already feeling and why it matters. Once you’ve made the connection to an action, create space for them to see how that feels. They’ll come back to you with their experiences and that’s how conversations start.

The coach who was worried about that post? He's now one of the most effective marketers in my mentorship program. Not because he got more manipulative. Because he got more honest.

The Truth Is…

You can't logic someone into transformation. You can't data-point someone into taking action. You can't systematize someone into giving a shit.

Emotion isn't the enemy of integrity. Emotion is the bridge between your expertise and their willingness to apply it.

The coaches who are afraid to use emotion aren't protecting their audience. They're protecting themselves from being seen.

If you're ready to build a coaching business that connects authentically and converts consistently, that's exactly what we work on inside Coaches Corner University. Apply here.

The question isn't whether emotion works. The question is whether you're brave enough to use it honestly.

Keep Raising the Bar,

Paul Oneid MS, MS, CSCS