The Four Leadership Positions Every Coach Needs to Master (And When to Use Each One)

I used to think leadership meant being the loudest voice in the room.

In my twenties, I believed coaching was about setting the example, showing up first, leaving last, being the hardest worker, and expecting everyone to follow. I led from the front because that's what I thought strong leaders did.

Three years ago, I sat across from a mentee who was burning out his entire roster. Every client felt micromanaged. His retention was shit. He couldn't understand why no one wanted to work with him, despite his results. The problem wasn't his coaching - it was his leadership position. He only knew how to lead from one place, and it was suffocating his clients.

That conversation forced me to audit my own leadership. I've learned that the best leaders aren't the ones who master one leadership position - they're the ones who can toggle between four distinct positions depending on what their client actually needs in that moment.

The Four Leadership Positions

Leading from the front means you're setting the example. You're the standard. You're showing them what's possible by being the product of your product. This is where most coaches live, and it's necessary - especially early in the relationship when trust is being built. Your clients need to see that you walk the walk. But if you stay here too long, you become a saviour. They start depending on you to do the hard things instead of learning to do them themselves.

Standing beside is vulnerability. It's walking through the fire together. This is where you share your own struggles, doubts, and failures. You're not pretending to have it all figured out - you're showing them that you're human too. I use this position when a client is facing something I've encountered. When they're doubting themselves, questioning if they have what it takes, or feeling isolated, this position builds deep trust because they realize you're not their saviour - you're their peer who happens to be a few steps ahead.

Pushing from behind is the nudge outside their comfort zone. This is where coaching gets uncomfortable. You're applying pressure, setting higher standards, calling them out when they're playing small. This is the "put in the fucking work" position. I use this when I see potential that they can't see in themselves yet. When they're capable of more, but fear is holding them back. The key here is timing - push too soon, and you break trust, push too late, and they plateau.

Stepping back is the most challenging position for most coaches to master. This is where you relinquish control. Where you let them walk on their own, even if they might stumble. Even if you could prevent the mistake, this is where leaders create other leaders. I use this position when a client has demonstrated competence and needs autonomy more than guidance, when the lesson they need to learn can only be learned by experiencing it themselves.

The Toggle Is the Skill

The coaches I mentor who struggle most are the ones stuck in one position. Dave operates almost entirely from the front - authoritative, leading by example. It works for some clients, but alienates others who need empathy. Meredith lives in stepping back - giving autonomy, trusting the process - but some clients need more structure and pressure early on.

The coaches who scale sustainably? They toggle. Laura moves fluidly between all four positions depending on where her client is in their journey. Amber naturally operates beside her clients, building trust through shared vulnerability, then pushes from behind when they're ready for more.

I think the best leaders are the ones who create other leaders and are comfortable toggling between those different positions. Knowing when to be in what position when and having the trust of that athlete, where you're not their saviour.

Your clients don't need you to be one type of leader. They need you to be the leader they need in each specific moment. That requires you to check your ego, pay attention to what they actually need rather than what you're comfortable giving, and develop the awareness to intentionally shift positions.

The question isn't "What kind of leader am I?" The question is "What kind of leader does this person need from me right now?"

If you're realizing you've been stuck in one leadership position and it's costing you client retention or growth, that's a systems problem - not a passion problem. The coaches in CCU learn to audit their leadership approach and build the flexibility to serve their clients from wherever they actually need support.

Because leading well isn't about being strong in one position, it's about mastering all four.

Keep Raising the Bar,

Paul Oneid MS, MS, CSCS